1 00:00:03,294 --> 00:00:04,336 - Phoebe. - Yeah? 2 00:00:04,504 --> 00:00:07,381 Look at that guy by the window. Wow! 3 00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:11,552 He's awfully short. And I think he's talking to himself. 4 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:14,596 And to be completely honest, he's not that good in bed. 5 00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:20,561 Ugh, what is wrong with me lately? It's, like, every guy I see. 6 00:00:20,729 --> 00:00:22,688 Look at that guy, for example. 7 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:26,066 Normally that's not someone that I would be attracted to. 8 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,110 But right now, with the way I'm feeling... 9 00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:32,448 ...all I wanna do is rip off his sweatpants and fanny pack. 10 00:00:33,158 --> 00:00:36,869 Wait a second! This is about the fourth month of your pregnancy, right? 11 00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:38,996 - Yeah. - This is completely normal. 12 00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:41,665 Around the fourth month, your hormones go crazy. 13 00:00:41,833 --> 00:00:45,044 - Really? So this happened to you? - Absolutely, yeah. 14 00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,671 And keep in mind, I was carrying triplets. 15 00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:52,217 So in medical terms, I was thrice as randy. 16 00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:55,137 Wow, this explains so much. 17 00:00:55,305 --> 00:01:00,184 Last weekend, I went from store to store, sitting on Santas' laps. 18 00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:03,270 Yeah, I remember trying to steal... 19 00:01:03,438 --> 00:01:06,398 ...a cardboard cutout of Evander Holyfield from a Footlocker. 20 00:01:06,566 --> 00:01:08,984 - Ugh. - Yeah, ugh. 21 00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:11,987 I go see my doctor tomorrow. I'll ask her about this. 22 00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:14,239 Maybe she can give me a pill or something. 23 00:01:14,407 --> 00:01:16,909 Yeah, that's what you need. A good pill. 24 00:01:55,865 --> 00:01:57,324 - Hey. - Hey. 25 00:01:57,492 --> 00:01:58,909 - Hey. - Hi. 26 00:01:59,077 --> 00:02:00,953 Look, I got our pictures developed. 27 00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:04,706 Oh, great. Joey, wanna check out pictures of me and Mona ice-skating? 28 00:02:04,874 --> 00:02:11,130 Oh, uh, ordinarily I would love to, but I am just swamped right now. 29 00:02:15,593 --> 00:02:19,388 Where are the pictures that creepy pretzel vendor took of us together? 30 00:02:19,556 --> 00:02:22,015 Oh, yeah. Probably at the end. 31 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:26,311 Oh, my God. All he took were pictures of my breasts! 32 00:02:26,479 --> 00:02:28,230 I'm missing picture time? 33 00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:36,029 You know, she has a face, Ross. 34 00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:41,827 - Okay, here's a good one of us. - Wow, that is a good one. 35 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,204 Wow, It looks like a holiday card... 36 00:02:44,372 --> 00:02:48,292 ...with the tree in the middle and the skaters and the snow. Heh. 37 00:02:48,459 --> 00:02:51,086 Every year I say I'll send cards and I never do it. 38 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:53,714 Do you wanna send this one out together? 39 00:02:58,303 --> 00:03:01,638 Together? Like, to people? 40 00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:05,559 Yeah, "Happy Holidays, from Mona and Ross." it'll be cute. Okay? 41 00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:08,353 Heh. Uh, okay. 42 00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:11,315 - Oh, I gotta get to work. Call me later? - Sure. 43 00:03:11,482 --> 00:03:12,858 - Bye, guys. - Bye. 44 00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,318 - Bye. - Yeah. 45 00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:19,406 Congratulations! You just got married! 46 00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:22,326 I know. Can you believe that? 47 00:03:22,493 --> 00:03:25,412 I'm sorry. What's the big deal about a holiday card? 48 00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:29,249 Married couples send out cards. Families send out cards. 49 00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:33,629 People who've been dating a few months do not send out cards. Is she crazy? 50 00:03:33,796 --> 00:03:36,256 Hey, hey, hey. That's your wife you're talking about. 51 00:03:38,593 --> 00:03:41,970 - Bing! Ho, and the Bingette! - Ah, heh. 52 00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:44,806 - Honey, you remember my boss, Doug. - Yes. Hi. 53 00:03:44,974 --> 00:03:49,394 So, good news, the divorce is final. I signed the papers this a.m. 54 00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:52,022 I didn't know you were getting a divorce. I'm sorry. 55 00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:55,359 Heh, sorry? Finally chewed my leg out of that bear trap. 56 00:03:56,653 --> 00:04:01,365 - Hey! Congratulations to you guys. - Heh. No leg-chewing for us. 57 00:04:01,532 --> 00:04:03,200 Well, give it time. 58 00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:08,622 So! The divorce, the marriage, we got a lot to celebrate. 59 00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:11,667 How about we go out to dinner tomorrow night? 60 00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:14,336 I can't think of anything we're doing. 61 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,381 Why can't I think of anything we're doing? 62 00:04:17,548 --> 00:04:20,384 Tomorrow night it is. I should be out of court by 6. 63 00:04:20,551 --> 00:04:22,678 They keep throwing sexual harassment cases at me... 64 00:04:22,845 --> 00:04:25,847 ...and I keep knocking them out of the park! Ha-ha-ha. 65 00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:28,058 Okay, see you tomorrow. 66 00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:31,019 Just so you know, we're not seeing him tomorrow. 67 00:04:32,021 --> 00:04:34,106 I cannot spend another evening with that man. 68 00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,275 Remember how he behaved at our wedding? 69 00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,694 - No. - Because he wasn't invited. 70 00:04:38,861 --> 00:04:41,905 Because of the way he behaved at our engagement party. 71 00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:46,326 Oh, yeah. Boy, urine cuts right through an ice sculpture, doesn't it? 72 00:04:52,583 --> 00:04:54,293 - Hi! - Hey. 73 00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:56,503 Hey, I went by the photo shop. Take a look. 74 00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:59,298 Here is a mockup of our card. What do you think? 75 00:05:02,343 --> 00:05:04,428 Huh. Wow, this is great. 76 00:05:04,595 --> 00:05:07,514 Now, do you think it should say, "Love, Ross and Mona"? 77 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:12,686 Well, we haven't said that to each other yet... 78 00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:17,107 ...but I guess it's okay to say it to other people. 79 00:05:17,275 --> 00:05:21,570 - How many did you want? I'm getting 100. - A hundred? Ha-ha-ha. 80 00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:26,783 Well, I, uh, guess I'll take, uh... 81 00:05:26,951 --> 00:05:28,785 Mona? 82 00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:34,916 Uh, I don't... I'm not sure about the whole, uh, card thing. 83 00:05:35,084 --> 00:05:36,585 Really? Why not? 84 00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:41,506 Sending out a holiday card together? 85 00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:46,261 I just don't know if we're really quite there yet. 86 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,349 I didn't think of it that way. You're right. You're right. 87 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:57,147 - So can I ask you a question? - Yeah. 88 00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:59,649 - Where are we? - Huh? 89 00:06:01,110 --> 00:06:05,238 You know, where are we? Where is this relationship going? 90 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:11,370 Hmm. 91 00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:16,166 I mean, I love spending time with you. I hope we're moving forward. 92 00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:18,543 We should talk about that, don't you think? 93 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,471 Let's do the card! 94 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:34,476 - What? - The card! I think we're there. 95 00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:38,688 Okay, but I still think we should have this conversation. 96 00:06:38,856 --> 00:06:43,985 Really? I mean, even with the card? 97 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:48,990 - Hi. - Hi. 98 00:06:49,158 --> 00:06:52,828 Just so you know, Dr. Long can't be here today. She was called to the hospital. 99 00:06:52,995 --> 00:06:54,663 So Dr. Schiff will be seeing you. 100 00:06:54,831 --> 00:06:58,250 Okay. Can I ask you a question? 101 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:03,046 Was it me, or was the guy who took my blood sample really cute? Heh. 102 00:07:03,214 --> 00:07:07,509 You know who I'm talking about? Bowl haircut, hairy fingers? 103 00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:14,474 - Hi, Rachel. I'm Dr. Schiff. - Yes, you are. 104 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:16,977 So how's it going? 105 00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:20,689 Oh, it's really good. But enough about me! Come on. Heh. 106 00:07:20,898 --> 00:07:23,859 Where are you from? What do you do? 107 00:07:25,194 --> 00:07:27,988 - I'm a doctor. - Right. I meant... 108 00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:31,533 ...you know, in your spare time. Do you cook? Ski? 109 00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:34,703 Or hang out with your wife or girlfriend? 110 00:07:34,871 --> 00:07:38,206 Uh, I don't have a wife or girlfriend, but I do ski. 111 00:07:38,374 --> 00:07:42,586 I love to ski! How amazing is this? 112 00:07:43,379 --> 00:07:47,883 - Are you experiencing any discomfort? - No, I'm very comfortable. 113 00:07:48,050 --> 00:07:51,470 - Any painful gas? - No! 114 00:07:52,763 --> 00:07:57,142 Ew, Dr. Schiff! What kind of question is that? 115 00:07:57,894 --> 00:08:00,896 Okay, then. Would you like to lie down on the table? 116 00:08:01,063 --> 00:08:03,899 Would you like me to lie down on the table? 117 00:08:05,067 --> 00:08:08,487 - Sorry, is there something going on here? - Do you feel it too? 118 00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:15,285 - Hi. - Oh, hey. So... 119 00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:18,497 ...how did your doctor's appointment go? - Well, let's see. 120 00:08:18,664 --> 00:08:21,124 Uh, they gave me "cute boy" doctor today. 121 00:08:21,292 --> 00:08:26,046 In the middle of the exam I put my pinkie in his chin dimple. 122 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:28,965 - Oh, my God! - Why did you do that? 123 00:08:29,133 --> 00:08:33,094 Okay, remember that problem I was having during my fourth month of pregnancy? 124 00:08:33,262 --> 00:08:36,264 Oh, yeah, the Evander Holyfield phase. 125 00:08:36,432 --> 00:08:40,519 Oh, man. You were so hard up, you practically came on to me. 126 00:08:40,686 --> 00:08:42,979 You wish! 127 00:08:43,272 --> 00:08:45,315 Hey, I could've had you if I wanted you. 128 00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:49,152 Oh, yeah? Come and get it. 129 00:08:49,862 --> 00:08:52,072 Okay, even this is turning me on. 130 00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:55,450 - Hey. - Oh, hey. 131 00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:59,120 Hey, Ross. How's it going with you and Mona? 132 00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,456 You guys still together? 133 00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:06,461 Oh, yeah, we're moving forward. You'll be getting our card. 134 00:09:07,129 --> 00:09:09,673 You and Mona are doing a holiday card together? 135 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,132 We're not just doing a card. 136 00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:15,011 She also wants to have the conversation about where the relationship is going. 137 00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:17,305 Ugh, women. 138 00:09:18,015 --> 00:09:21,643 I know! Why do you guys need to have this conversation, huh? 139 00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:25,522 No self-respecting man would ask a woman, "So where is this going?" 140 00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:27,482 Uh, Ross, you asked me that. 141 00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:31,736 Hey, you were a closed book, okay? I'm not a mind reader! 142 00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:38,451 Besides, I hate those conversations. I'm horrible at them, really. 143 00:09:38,619 --> 00:09:41,121 Maybe I need some kind of a gesture. 144 00:09:41,289 --> 00:09:44,916 Something that says we're moving forward without having to talk about it. 145 00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:49,754 - Like asking her to move in with you? - Wha...? Ha. Smaller than that. 146 00:09:50,298 --> 00:09:53,550 - Making her a mix tape? - Uh, bigger than that. 147 00:09:53,718 --> 00:09:57,804 - Give her a key to your apartment. - Whoa, hello. We were closer with the tape. 148 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:01,516 Have you said "I love you"? Say, "I love you." 149 00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:04,853 I don't... I don't think I'm quite there yet. 150 00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:08,481 But, oh, I could say, "I love spending time with you." 151 00:10:08,649 --> 00:10:11,234 - No, we hate that. - That is a slap in the face. 152 00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:16,656 Oh, forget it. You know what? I'll just have the conversation. 153 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:21,703 I'll just say, "I like things the way they are," and hope for the best. 154 00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:24,122 What do you think, Rach? 155 00:10:24,373 --> 00:10:27,626 I think if it was a little colder in here... 156 00:10:27,793 --> 00:10:30,420 ...I could see your nipples through that sweater. 157 00:10:35,092 --> 00:10:38,053 Bing, we're all set for tonight. 8:00. 158 00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:41,264 Oh, uh, as it turns out, we can't do it. Monica has to work. 159 00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:44,309 Oh. My ex-wife didn't work. 160 00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:47,395 Unless you call turning into her mother "work." 161 00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:51,524 Now, fine. Tomorrow night, then. 162 00:10:51,692 --> 00:10:54,235 Oh, uh, well, tomorrow's no good for her, either. 163 00:10:54,403 --> 00:10:55,445 Oh? Why not? 164 00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:58,740 It's the semifinals... 165 00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,492 ...of her... 166 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,244 ...bocce ball tournament. 167 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,997 - Ahem. - What's going on, Bing? 168 00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:10,335 Does, uh, your wife have a problem with me, or something? 169 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,213 Well now you're just talking crazy. 170 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:16,424 Then why can't the three of us go out together? 171 00:11:16,592 --> 00:11:19,761 Because, uh, we split up. 172 00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:22,055 Monica and I split up. 173 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,224 Hold me. 174 00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:27,602 Good God, Bing. 175 00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:30,313 Well, I can't say I'm altogether surprised. 176 00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:34,609 I saw the way she looked at you, and there was no love there. 177 00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:40,281 And the way she looked at me, pure lust. 178 00:11:40,825 --> 00:11:42,909 What would help me through this tough time... 179 00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:45,370 ...is choking someone. Can I choke you? 180 00:11:46,288 --> 00:11:49,541 Bing, my boy, we're gonna get you over this. 181 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:53,253 Here's the plan: Grab your coat, we're going to a strip club! 182 00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:55,338 Oh, no, Monica would freak. 183 00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:58,925 But to hell with that bitch! 184 00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:04,639 Here we go. 185 00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:07,016 Ah, Mona, um... 186 00:12:07,184 --> 00:12:12,188 ...I think it's time we had a conversation about where things are with us. 187 00:12:12,356 --> 00:12:15,024 Yeah, I think I suggested that. 188 00:12:15,818 --> 00:12:18,862 Heh. Uh, we are so... 189 00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:24,117 So, um... 190 00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,119 ...well, I really like you. 191 00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:29,998 And I love, um, you know, hanging out with you. 192 00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:34,335 And I'm having a lot of fun. 193 00:12:38,799 --> 00:12:40,467 Okay. 194 00:12:40,634 --> 00:12:45,638 I mean, there's no point in spending time with someone if it's just fun. 195 00:12:45,806 --> 00:12:50,059 - It's gotta be going somewhere, right? - Ha, ha. 196 00:12:50,227 --> 00:12:53,188 So where is it going? 197 00:12:55,691 --> 00:12:57,233 Ah. 198 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:02,238 That's the real question. 199 00:13:05,075 --> 00:13:08,369 And the answer is... 200 00:13:08,537 --> 00:13:11,873 ...it's going somewhere... 201 00:13:12,666 --> 00:13:14,667 ...fun. 202 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:20,715 I know what you're thinking. Fun was fine for you 10 years ago. 203 00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:23,760 - Ha-ha-ha. - But you're not getting any younger. 204 00:13:24,887 --> 00:13:29,849 No, I mean, not you. Not you. You are getting younger! 205 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:36,606 You look like you're getting younger by the second. What's your secret? 206 00:13:38,734 --> 00:13:41,945 I'm sorry, so, uh, where are we? 207 00:13:42,112 --> 00:13:44,280 Well, to sum up: 208 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:53,456 We're having fun. You look young. 209 00:13:57,253 --> 00:14:00,171 - Okay... - But that's not enough. 210 00:14:03,050 --> 00:14:06,135 So, heh, so... 211 00:14:07,596 --> 00:14:11,641 ...here's a key to my apartment. 212 00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:15,270 - Really? - Really. 213 00:14:16,897 --> 00:14:20,316 - You don't think this is too fast? - Mm-mm. 214 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:28,241 You gave her a key to your apartment? 215 00:14:28,409 --> 00:14:32,078 Not just a key, I gave her the only key! 216 00:14:34,456 --> 00:14:38,793 I am now a homeless person in a very serious relationship. 217 00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:46,342 - Oh, Ross, how'd the conversation go? - Great. I live on the street. 218 00:14:46,594 --> 00:14:47,844 Where? 219 00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:50,930 - Hey! - Hi. 220 00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:53,975 Okay, Monica, Rachel, this is my friend Roger. 221 00:14:54,143 --> 00:14:55,977 - Hi, Roger. - Hi, Roger. 222 00:14:56,145 --> 00:14:58,104 - Hi. - So, um, I'm gonna get us some drinks. 223 00:14:58,272 --> 00:14:59,480 - Okay. - Could you help me? 224 00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:02,066 Yeah, okay. 225 00:15:06,780 --> 00:15:10,283 Um, he's here to have sex with you. 226 00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:16,331 - What? - You're welcome. 227 00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:19,000 Phoebe, no! 228 00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,002 It's okay. He's a virgin. 229 00:15:25,799 --> 00:15:27,926 Rachel, um, I was talking to this guy... 230 00:15:28,093 --> 00:15:30,470 ...and I think he'll have sex with you. - Okay... 231 00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:33,348 - Yeah, okay. Let's leave these two alone. - Aah! 232 00:15:33,515 --> 00:15:36,017 No. I don't care what my hormones are doing. 233 00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:39,145 I'm not gonna just do it with some random guy. 234 00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:43,483 Fine. Then you tell Roger. He was really looking forward to this. 235 00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:04,712 Ooh, Bing, look at those twin sisters dancing together. 236 00:16:05,547 --> 00:16:08,925 Let me buy you a lap dance with those girls, huh? 237 00:16:09,093 --> 00:16:13,346 That's all right, sir. And that's just one girl. 238 00:16:14,181 --> 00:16:16,557 Bing, what's this? 239 00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:20,311 It's a hand. It's a thing you use as a Jack and Coke holder. 240 00:16:20,479 --> 00:16:23,147 No, it's a wedding ring. You gotta get rid of it. 241 00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:25,525 We're gonna go to the East River and throw it in! 242 00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,151 - Oh, no, no, no! - Yeah, yeah! 243 00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:29,237 I did, and I felt a hell of a lot better! 244 00:16:29,405 --> 00:16:32,448 If you whip it right, you might hit a seagull in the head. 245 00:16:34,576 --> 00:16:38,204 Okay. Oh, I'm gonna need a bunch of extra keys. 246 00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:41,624 Apparently, I give them away for no reason at all. 247 00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:47,630 Hey, Ross, what's going on? You changing the lock? 248 00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:49,257 No, heh. 249 00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:51,384 That guy is. 250 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:52,760 I don't understand. 251 00:16:52,928 --> 00:16:55,805 You give me a key to your apartment and then change the lock? 252 00:16:56,390 --> 00:16:59,726 - Uh... - Good luck, buddy. 253 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:04,522 Um, I thought we were moving forward. 254 00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:08,276 And now you're sending me all these mixed signals. 255 00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:10,111 What are you trying to tell me? 256 00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:14,574 I'm trying to tell you... 257 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:18,619 ...I made you a mix tape. 258 00:17:19,955 --> 00:17:22,457 - What? - I love you. 259 00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:25,918 Oh! Aww! 260 00:17:26,086 --> 00:17:27,628 Heh, oh. 261 00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:31,257 And I love spending time with you. 262 00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:41,893 - Hi, honey, I'm home. - From the tequila factory? 263 00:17:42,936 --> 00:17:44,270 It was awful. 264 00:17:44,438 --> 00:17:47,774 To get out of dinner with Doug, I told him you and I split up. 265 00:17:47,941 --> 00:17:50,985 So he took me to all these strip clubs and sleazy bars. 266 00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:55,907 And when I wouldn't give him my wedding ring, he threw a soda can at a bird. 267 00:17:56,492 --> 00:17:59,285 Come here. I can breathe through my mouth. 268 00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:03,623 Know what the worst part was? 269 00:18:03,791 --> 00:18:06,834 I got to see what my life would be like without you. 270 00:18:07,002 --> 00:18:10,797 It was like It's a Wonderful Life with lap dances. 271 00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:15,760 Please promise me that you'll never leave me... 272 00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:20,640 ...that we'll grow old together, and be with each other the rest of our lives. 273 00:18:20,808 --> 00:18:22,517 I promise. 274 00:18:24,186 --> 00:18:28,356 Hey, speaking of together, how about we send out a holiday card this year? 275 00:18:28,857 --> 00:18:31,275 Ooh, I don't know if we're there yet. 276 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:38,491 Yes, I'd like to order a pizza. Can I ask you a question? 277 00:18:38,659 --> 00:18:44,122 Is the cute blond guy delivering tonight? Very "Abercrombie & Fitch." 278 00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:46,916 - I'll call you back. - Who was that? 279 00:18:47,084 --> 00:18:51,504 - Just the pizza place. - You hung up on the pizza place? 280 00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,840 I don't hang up on your friends. 281 00:18:54,716 --> 00:18:58,302 - Sorry, I'm just having a rough day. - Oh. What's wrong? 282 00:18:58,470 --> 00:19:02,723 - Oh, you really don't wanna hear about it. - Then why did I ask? 283 00:19:02,891 --> 00:19:05,601 Okay. It's just that this is really embarrassing. 284 00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:07,979 But lately with this pregnancy thing... 285 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:11,816 ...I'm just finding myself... 286 00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:14,735 How do I put this? Um... 287 00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:17,029 Erotically charged. 288 00:19:18,365 --> 00:19:21,951 Is that college talk for "horny"? 289 00:19:22,703 --> 00:19:25,913 Yeah. So, you know, I have all of these feelings... 290 00:19:26,081 --> 00:19:27,999 ...and I don't know what to do about them. 291 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:30,084 Because I can't date like a normal person. 292 00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,211 Which is fine, I don't need a relationship. 293 00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:36,299 All I really want is one great night. Just sex. 294 00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:39,260 You know? No strings attached. No relationship. 295 00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:43,973 Just with someone I feel comfortable with and who knows what he's doing. 296 00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:49,687 For just one great night. I mean, is that really so hard... 297 00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:53,399 ...to find? 298 00:19:58,405 --> 00:20:00,239 So how was your day? 299 00:20:00,407 --> 00:20:04,702 Good. I, uh, saw a pretty big pigeon. 300 00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:12,585 I gotta get up early, and it's almost 7:00. 301 00:20:12,753 --> 00:20:14,795 Yeah, I gotta go to my room too. 302 00:20:14,963 --> 00:20:17,298 - Okay, good night. - Good night! 303 00:20:20,135 --> 00:20:22,762 - I can't do it! - I didn't ask you to! 304 00:20:22,930 --> 00:20:24,347 - You're Rachel! - You're Joey! 305 00:20:24,514 --> 00:20:27,266 - You're my friend! Yeah. - Right back at you. 306 00:20:27,434 --> 00:20:30,770 Plus, it would be wrong, and weird and bad! 307 00:20:30,938 --> 00:20:34,899 So bad! I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't ask you to do anything. 308 00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:37,235 I know! 309 00:20:45,827 --> 00:20:47,203 - You wanna do it? - No! 310 00:20:47,371 --> 00:20:51,207 - Me neither, I'm just testing you! - That's the end of this conversation! 311 00:20:51,375 --> 00:20:53,918 - This conversation never happened. - Never happened. 312 00:20:54,086 --> 00:20:56,212 - Good night. - Good night! 313 00:21:02,511 --> 00:21:03,970 Get back in there! 314 00:21:10,852 --> 00:21:15,731 Hi. Listen, ahem, I'm sorry about that whole thing with Roger. 315 00:21:15,899 --> 00:21:18,609 It really wasn't right, and I wanna make it up to you. 316 00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:21,612 So, um, I brought you something... 317 00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:24,115 ...that I think you'll really enjoy. Okay. 318 00:21:31,790 --> 00:21:37,295 Now this is just a loan, okay? I'm gonna want him back. So... 319 00:21:38,338 --> 00:21:40,256 I'm gonna go now. 320 00:21:44,553 --> 00:21:47,430 I'm sorry, I thought I could do it, and I can't.